In this blog post, we will look at how the proliferation of Ashley Madison, a site that arranges affairs for married people, affects our society’s views on marriage and moral values.
On February 26, 2015, the Constitutional Court ruled 7-2 that Article 241, Paragraph 1 of the Criminal Act, commonly known as the adultery law, which stipulates that “A person who has a spouse and commits adultery shall be punished by imprisonment for not more than two years, and the same shall apply to a person who commits adultery with such a person,” is unconstitutional. The explanation is that changes in the times, such as changes in people’s perception of privacy and an open attitude towards sex, were the basis for the decision to be unconstitutional.
In line with this, the site “Ashley Madison” is emerging as a hot potato. Ashley Madison, a Canadian online dating site that lures users with the slogan “Life is short, have an affair,” is a site that arranges meetings for married people. The site had been blocked in Korea by the Korea Communications Commission, but it has re-landed in Korea after the adultery law was abolished as unconstitutional, and the controversy over its pros and cons is heating up.
It may be natural for people in Korean society, where Confucian sentiments are deeply rooted, to view this online site, which targets a “subtle” niche, with a critical eye. If you talk to people around you about this site or look at social media, you can see that many people are unable to hide their discomfort. The government is also taking various actions to reflect this sentiment. Since the abolition of adultery, several lawmakers have proposed related bills, and the National Assembly is in full swing to amend the law to complement it.
However, there is an interesting point. Before the adultery law was abolished, as soon as this site entered the Korean market, tens of thousands of domestic members were recruited in a short period of time, and the number of subscribers has increased rapidly since the adultery law was abolished. This shows that many Koreans have a positive attitude toward this site’s entry into Korea, which goes against the general public sentiment. In fact, the non-profit organization OpenNet issued a statement titled “Should Ashley Madison be blocked?” and put a stop to the government and the National Assembly’s efforts to block Ashley Madison.
So why do people sign up for this site? The answer is obvious. Ashley Madison arranges private meetings between married people, and members pay a certain amount of money in exchange. In other words, they use the site because they want to have sexual encounters with people other than their spouses, that is, to have an affair. There are more of these people than you might think, and the number is increasing. Why is that?
Although there are differences in the methods and systems of each country, in modern society, generally unrelated men and women leave their homes and enter into marriage to create a new family. Marriage requires purity, meaning that only sexual relations with one’s spouse are allowed. The main motive for marriage is to participate in lawful and affectionate sexual relations to form a family and have children. These motives are the most basic values of marriage.
Adultery is against the fundamental values of marriage, and for this reason, it is almost taboo in our society. However, the surprising fact is that adultery is happening more frequently than you might think. According to a survey conducted by a research institute in Korea on married women aged 24 to 35, 43.3% of the respondents answered “yes” when asked, “Do you have a lover other than your husband?” According to Sungkyunkwan University’s master’s thesis “A Study on Extramarital Relationships of Married Men and Women,” a survey of 196 women living in Seoul and Gyeonggi-do found that 40.3% of married women had had extramarital relationships in the past or present.
Amidst this, a very fast shortcut called Ashley Madison has emerged. Anyone can easily access it by simply entering some basic information to sign up, and members can share information with each other on the site and easily find a partner of their liking, allowing them to casually interact with multiple people. Because of these advantages, the number of people visiting this site to find a partner for an affair is increasing.
So why do people turn their eyes to other people of the opposite sex while leaving their spouses? There are many reasons for having an affair, but the fundamental reason is that the relationship with one’s spouse becomes neglected. As the relationship continues, the experience of sharing passionate love is forgotten, and feelings gradually become dull, and naturally one wants to be with another person. In other words, by having an affair, one tries to fill the satisfaction that cannot be obtained from one’s current spouse.
So, in the end, can you get the right mental value when you have an affair? In other words, can people who join this site get the right mental value? I have a negative view on this question. Taking painkillers to forget the pain when you break a bone by hitting a rock is not a cure. Instead, it only creates a tolerance for painkillers, and sufficient rest and nutrition are needed to heal the bones. In other words, having an affair driven by immediate desires will eventually lead to physical relationships and the pursuit of pleasure, but it will not be a fundamental solution. Instead, it will only lead to the destruction of a precious family.
Therefore, it is important for us to establish the right values regarding infidelity. Ashley Madison is a harmful site that promotes infidelity with the dangerous phrase “healthy extramarital affairs” to lure those obsessed with one-dimensional desires and take money out of their wallets. I do not want readers to be fooled by such a low-quality site. I hope that everyone will share mature love based on the values they have for their spouse, the values they have for sex, and the values they have for marriage, without betraying the basic values of our society.
